2nd day of 2010..

Happy new year all..

its a new year..i rmb i use to celebrate happily like when aunt grace is here..we even party on our own with the xmas tree still at a corner, with the telvision switched to channel 5/8 to watch the count down (last tym dun hav channel u yet..) and with our small little keyboard with inbuilt music rhythms inside..though its not like there is a lot of food, alcohol or watever.maybe jus some delivery pizzas..but it was fun..its like we were jus so contented everytime when we get to eat pizzas..we dance like it isnt a dance at all in the hall..we were jus so simply contented, happy and fun..simple life simple thoughts..other times when i grew elder..on the last day of the year..in my heart, there are sounds..i'll ask myself, what have i completed?what have i achieved?what are my goals for next year?such resolutions arises..tgt as i hit youthful days to teenages..countdown began to be celebrated in church..sometimes a little boring but still becos its a new year..there s jus some kind of feeling..some satisfaction, happy, welcoming...not really sure hw to describe though..

well, this time..there isnt any special feelings tt 2010 is here, i din feel lyk hw it was suppose to feel..i din feel glad..i dunno y..and for tis year..i dunno wht to set..dunno wht to expect..dunno wht to do..mayb cos its a transition period..where i shd be considering this year if i shd further study uni or stop here..and if i were to stop..where shd i start working from?outside?for dad?but actually its pretty obvious ryte..even before i graduate..like e past few days..he's alrdy telling me his plans and the things awaiting for me to takeover and organized.like he has it all planned out so doesnt it makes asking such questions redundant?but its also wht headaches me..sometimes i wish im arent part of his plans..like maybe if he hadnt had such plans and i were to plan out everything myself, it wouldnt have been these vexing..but such statements are real hurting isnt it...things seems to have been pathed for me so there shdnt be much to worry abt isnt it?but somehow..im still vexed over these issues..its really a headache..somehow..what im suppose to be feeling isnt wht im experiencing and feeling..

somehow..it jus seems tt 2010 is gonna be tough, long not as enjoyable..like its a gng to be a year that i wouldnt like..such emo statements shdnt b said on e 2nd day of a new year isnt it?

on the other side..relationship issues..haiiz..or maybe i shd end it here..ha..but how shd it end when there isnt a start?how i wish there was..at least there wont be much regrets..so tell me to stop here and go no where further..tell me i shd let a new year be a new beginning..otherwise let what dint started start..impossible isnt it..so stop thinking abt it alrdy pearleen tan..stop thinking and missing..

2nd day of a new year..sounds pretty emo isnt it..haha..

new changes to many things for the 2010..changes can be for the good.it can also be for the worse..but wld one know if its for the good or bad?maybe yes till the outcome happens..wldnt it be too late by then?though i dun really like some of the changes made in bcm..but well..i'll accept it to my best effort..and i'll try my best to give equally much or even more this year than last year..pearleen and amanda..pearleen and amanda..hope pearleen and amanda will end up being good partners...

since the various changes are wanted..i shall not say much too..i suppose somethings need to be observed for a while..need to observe the characteristic of the different newbies in e team..parting w aaron tan is a lil pity..afterall we played with each other for lyk 2-3 years..hmm.. cos partner so long le play tgt also v easy..kind of used to it..of cos u can also say..its time to get out of the comfort zone..as for e rest..shallnt say much..i learnt to keep silent more now..

maybe this year..i shd aim to be a person that ppl will find amiss of cos in a good way when im arent around..i suppose its only then that a person have achieve something in life..? Mayb like things wont seem right when pearleen isnt at bcm or cell or wherever...hopefully then..its not easy too right..?

Though its tough to, though its hardto, though its watever to let God have his will..but Lord..let your will be done in all things..